I want to start off by thanking everyone for their prayers these past couple of days! It means so much to me and I’m so thankful and humbled to know that there are so many people in so many corners of the globe lifting me up to the Lord. I’ve been asked what’s going on and I’ll explain in just a minute. But first I want to talk about last week. 🙂
Ok. So. We had our first week of lectures this past week and it was amazing. Our first speakers were great and really got me super stoaked for the speakers to come! God moved so much through their words and also through their actions. It was such a pleasure and an honor to get to know them in such a chill setting. I’ll give you just a few examples of the things they taught on and what impacted me the most. First of all, they talked about how God is a lover. He loves us. I know it might seem elementary, but I definitely forget sometimes that I don’t have to pursue God’s love or try to earn it. He gives it freely. Another topic was that God is a Good Dad. This was a pivotal statement for me, especially with everything that’s been going on the last few days. I’ve reminded myself over and over that if God is a Good Dad, then He will answer my prayers. He won’t ignore me, because He loves me and wants to show that to me.
That’s just a few things that we discussed this past week. We also got some really good snow Wednesday night so we got to shred some pow Thursday afternoon at the beautiful mountain Parsenn. Check out this view.
Switzerland is such a beautiful place.
I may never come home.
Seriously though. 🙂
Alright, so I suppose I should let you all know what’s going on. I want to preface by saying that I am ok. I’m alive. 🙂
This past Sunday afternoon we were out shredding again. We’d gotten a fair amount of snow during the week and we were all ready for a good, long day of shredding. The day started off great. The snow was good during the morning, but as the day wore on it started to get chunky and heavy, but I was still having a great time. A little after noon, the group I was with started to split up. Aleah broke the a binding on her board and ended up heading home. Ben and I decided to see if we could catch up with some of the other guys and hopefully find some decent powder. We had just ridden up the chair lift and saw the guys riding some pow under the lift. So when we got to the top, I figured if we rode pretty hard on the main groomed run, we’d meet them at the bottom of the lift. The snow at this point was a little sketchy, especially at the top part of the run. But I’m pretty confident in my skiing abilities, so I didn’t really think anything of it, I just went down. As we went farther down, I was just enjoying the run. I was thinking about how fun it was going to be to catch up with the guys and shred together and just how good God was, because I was skiing down a mountain in the stinking Alps and just enjoying His creation. At that moment, I was so full. I was just satisfied and so happy. Content. Amazed that God brought me here and that I got to ski in the Alps with all my friends and just praise God through that.
Then I started to realize that I was going a little fast. Not out-of-control fast, but the snow was pretty sketchy and I didn’t really know the run that well, so I was going too fast to pay attention to where I needed to go and what the snow was like in front of me. So I decided to slow down a little and started to turn left. As soon as my skis started turning, I knew it wasn’t going to end well. My skis caught in the snow super fast and just stopped. My knees compressed and there was a little pop, pop and then what felt like fire in my right knee. I just went limp. (And confession…. I may have said some bad words… oopsies.) I fell to the ground and just let myself slide down until I stopped, the whole time just moaning and wishing that I would stop moving. When I finally stopped, there were a bunch of Swiss people around me, all asking me questions in Swiss-German, and I just laid there moaning, trying to catch my breath and communicate that I only spoke English. One of the guys that stopped spoke English and asked if I was ok. At that point, I had no idea. All I knew is that there had been a pop in my knee, and I knew that that generally wasn’t a good thing. This man helped me take my skis off and I sat up and straightened my legs. Ben had already flown past me before I fell, but thankfully he realized what happened and was hiking back up the hill towards me. The Swiss man asked again if I was ok and at that point, my knee felt fine. So I told him I thought I was and he skied off. Since my knee didn’t hurt, I tried to stand up. I pushed myself up with my left leg first and then tried to stand on my right.
As soon as I put pressure on it, my knee just gave way and my leg fell underneath me.
Hands-down, the scariest moment of my life. I had no idea what had just happened inside of my body and it scared the crap out of me. Thankfully, another local (who spoke practically perfect English) stopped and asked if I was alright. I’m so glad Ben was there, because I was freaking out and couldn’t really function like a normal human being. So Ben told him that I wasn’t ok and that we needed a sled to come take me down the hill. I’m convinced that this Swiss guy was sent straight from God. He had the number to call already in his phone and he called and took care of everything. He told us that someone was coming and that they would be there in 10-20 minutes. Then he and his buddies made sure we were alright and headed down the hill. So I sat in the snow, trying to get my emotions under control while we waited for the ski patrol guy to come pick me up. (Let me just insert an observation: snow is cold. Especially when you sit in it for 15 minutes or so. In case you were wondering, now you know.) Ben was great. He just kept talking and joking around, keeping my mind off of the fact that I was actually probably seriously hurt. And he prayed for my knee while we sat there. The faith of this guy astounds me. I wish I had faith like he does. He just kept telling me that God was going to heal me. He said everything was going to be fine because God was in control and He was going to heal me, as simple as that.
The sled was thee coolest thing I’ve ever seen. This little old man, probably a couple of inches shorter than I and close to 60, came ripping down the hill, pulling this sled behind him. He splinted my leg and helped me onto the sled and then pulled me down the hill behind him. I’m telling you. This little man was rad. He was the definition of boss. Time for another confession. While I was riding head-first down the mountain in this sled, I may or may not have started laughing. Yeah… not exactly the most appropriate timing, but lets be real. First of all, I’m pretty sure I was in shock. So there’s that. And second of all, I’m like pretty much deathly afraid of sledding. Like terrified. And here I was, hurtling down this hill (maybe not hurtling, but still), head first. I don’t know why, but I just thought it was hilarious. I kinda wish Ben would have taken a picture, but oh well. 🙂
At the bottom, they loaded me into the ambulance (first time riding in an ambulance! It was just a day full of new experiences… 🙂 ) and took me to the hospital. Again, I’m so thankful Ben was there. He kept joking around and being sarcastic. At one point he apologized for being so sarcastic and not sympathetic, but I told him that that was actually what I needed at that point. If it would have been anyone else there with me, I’m pretty sure I would have just fallen apart. But Ben’s jokes kept me from focusing on the fact that I had no idea what was going on.
When we got to the hospital, the doctors came and looked at my knee. At first they thought it was just my MCL that had been stretched or torn. They did an x-ray to make sure that there were no breaks in my bones (which there were none, praise Jesus). After the x-ray, two more doctors came in and looked at my knee. The moved it around and poked at it and finally said that I needed to have an MRI because my cruciate ligament might have been ruptured too. So they took me down to the MRI (where I took a nice, 20 minute nap. That’s what MRIs are for, right?) and when I got back up to my room, they told me that I had ruptured my MCL, cruciate ligament, and that my meniscus had been detached as well. I’m still amazed at the fact that I never fell apart in front of the doctors. They’re telling me all of these things and, to be honest, I have pretty much no idea what any of it means. They gave me a brace and some crutches, set up an appointment for me on Monday to meet with the doctor to discuss surgery, and Aleah came and picked me up to bring me back to the base.
So fast-forwarding a little bit, I started physical therapy yesterday and will look into surgery the first week of February. My PT told me that I could put weight on my leg, so that makes walking around a lot easier. I’m still stupid slow, but its way easier than what I was trying to do before without putting weight on it at all. I’m not in any pain, unless I tweak it wrong, so that’s good as well.
The Body of Christ just blows me away. I’ve been told so many times by so many people that they’re praying for me and that they have people praying for me as well. There are literally people across the globe praying for this injury. I am so humbled by that. At first, I was pretty mad at God. I felt like I didn’t know how to handle what was happening and I didn’t know what to do. I didn’t understand why God could let this happen. Our speaker last week talked about how God was a Good Dad. I kept wondering how if He was a Good Dad, then why wouldn’t He just heal me and make it better? And then I began to realize something. I only see the piece of the picture that’s in front of me. I don’t see what God sees. His picture is so much bigger and He can touch so many people through this if I let Him. I just keep feeling that this is so much bigger than I realize. God’s plan goes way beyond anything I could ever fathom. And even thought I have no idea where He’s going with this, I can honestly say that I’m excited to see what He’s going to do with it. I expect big things from our Big God. He’s a Good Dad. He doesn’t do things just to mess with us. Everything He does has a purpose, even if we don’t know what that is. He is in everything, even if we can’t see Him. And that just blows me away.
So if you’re reading this, I ask that you would please pray for me. Pray that I don’t loose faith. Pray that I keep trusting God throughout this whole ordeal. Pray that my faith and trust would be strengthened through this and that God would use this injury and me to reach others. And pray for healing. I want to see God do something amazing. It’s not a question of if God will heal us or not. He healed every single person that asked for it in the Bible. So there’s no doubt in my mind that He will heal me, too. But it’s going to be in His timing and in His perfect way. And I’m just so stoaked to see what that looks like.
I want to thank everyone for their prayers already. I can’t even begin to express how blessed I feel to know that there is literally an army of prayer warriors out there right now lifting me up. You guys are awesome. Thank you so much.
And I want to apologize for taking so long to get around to telling you all what’s going on. Life has been pretty crazy for the past four days. 🙂